ꜰɪʀᴇᴅᴀɴᴄᴇʀ

Elizabeth Baxter was born in Los Angeles, California to two dentists who had expected a little boy. Though they had originally intended to name her Elijah, they were surprised to find a screaming and fist-waving little girl in their midst. Her name quickly changed, and their love shifted from baseballs and catchers mitts to easy bake ovens and frilly dresses. The pair had been dying for a child ever since they'd been married- five years before, when they'd met at a dentist's convention in San Diego. Elizabeth's mother had been deemed incapable of carrying a child by doctor after doctor, and when the pair had finally given up and began to consider adoption, Elizabeth appeared- first posing as a boy, but later a very fat, very happy, little baby girl.
Elizabeth was blessed as a child in ways that many children were not. Elizabeth's parents considered her a gift from God, and as such, they attended church regularly, giving Elizabeth a spiritual structure and the ability to make friends outside of her usual schooling. Elizabeth loved church- she had never known anything else, and she got genuine excitement out of putting on a new dress and going to Sunday school every week. Sunny California gave Elizabeth the chance to visit beaches, go to Madonna concerts, and grow up exactly how any spoiled little blonde girl would have wanted- the total and complete love of her well-off parents' lives.
Elizabeth was ten years old when her mother died of breast cancer, and while she remmebers her mother very fondly, their history has always been vague, fuzzy, and a ltitle hard to put together. She remembers Easter egg hunting in matching dresses, she remembers singing into vacuums in self-made concerts, she remmebers baking cookies and putting them out for Santa- but having lost her mother at such a young age, Elizabeth began to feel as if she was almost an enigma, a woman who existed on the cusp of her life but did not exist in its entirety, a guardian angel she had had the chance to get a little too close to.
Struck by loneliness after his wife's death, Elizabeth's father took to AOL chats to strike conversations with people all over the world. He was too sad to leave his house, but he craved companionship with an adult, with someone who could understand the trials of losing his wife. It was there that he met his second wife, and the two fell in love quickly. When Elizabeth was 11 years old, the two packed up and moved to Nashville, Tennessee.
Elizabeth, of course, was furious. The death of her mother had been particularly difficult on her, but the move from LA to Nashville was a large one, and she felt completely alone. It was only after she met her new stepsister, Alaska, that she began to feel any sort of kinship or connection to the place. Elizabeth delved deeper into her faith and used music as an outlet for her constant frustrations. She was 13 years old when she landed a deal with the Christian rock Red Hill Records, who produced her first and self-titled album, Elizabeth Baxter. The Christian rock album inevitably gained her absolutely no traction, but Elizabeth was undeterred. Three years later, she finished high school and moved back to Los Angeles, determined to follow her dreams as a musician.
Fresh out of high school, Elizabeth moved into a small apartment in Hollywood, singing at bars for tips and eating ramen noodles. She had beegun to garner a cult reputation on the popular social media website MySpace, and with it had come a new angle- she wanted to be a pop star, the new Madonna, the kind of girl who wore bright pink leotards and did flips along the stage. Her religious beliefs were slowly starting to wear off- though she still felt like she had a solid foundation in God, her beliefs slowly move from "religious" to "spiritual." It was through MySpace and her constant singing at various bars in Hollywood that she landed her first recording contract- as the new, shiny and happy, Lizzy Lamb.
Still, Lizzy Lamb wasn't getting anywhere until the very well-know "I Kissed a Girl"- the lyrics were controversial, and as they came on the cusp of a movement of gay characters getting more attention, Lizzy was propelled into fame with the hit. Immediately, feminists began to rally against her- they believed that she was using the idea of homosexuality to get attention, only amplifying the myth that women who liked women only existed when they were drunk or looking for a little fun. Lizzy wasn't quite ready to admit her own pansexuality, and so she quietly swallowed the criticism. It became clear to her then, and repeatedly was made known to her over the next eight years, that the world she came from was very sheltered- though she never intended to offend, she did it often, and each time she had to learn.
At first, Lizzy hated herself for her missteps. She had a black stepsister, who was arguably the most important person in her life, and yet she constantly seemed to say or do things that were offensive to people of different ethnicities. It took years for Lizzy to decide to own her mistakes- she said things she regretted, but so did many other people- the things she had said weren't okay, but she was one of a handful of women in the industry who were expected to never make mistakes. Lizzy began to speak out directly about it- she considered herself an intersectional feminist, and while many people on the Internet were constantly disagreeing, she believed her past mistakes only fueled her want to stand up for all women- sure, she said some stupid shit in her past, but every day she grew more aware and tried harder to support women who were given less in life. Lizzy stopped paying attention to those who held her accountable for things she had genuinely apologized for, and instead began to strive every day to make strides toward true acceptance.
With Lizzy's fame, she was propelled into the spotlight. Over the years she began to reveal more and more about herself- that she loved women as much as men, that she no longer felt religious but that she still felt a very deep bond to her past beliefs, and that she knew that there were things that she could never understand as a white girl who grew up in Los Angeles. With her newfound confidence in herself came a big mouth- Lizzy was never afraid to say how she felt, no matter how the press might twist her opinions. She supported all women, but had no problem telling them when she thought they were out of line. She certainly had no problems calling out men and, in general, had developed a sort of fearlessness that was unrivaled. Even when Lizzy should have arguably been an adult and kept her mouth shut, she spoke freely, garnering her a very polarizing opinion from her fans and haters. Lizzy was simply Lizzy- she didn't apologize for it, she accepted it, and had no problem putting her own failures on broadcast. With that came people who loved her honesty and authenticity, and people who thought she should never be seen as a role model for anyone, let alone young girls. Still, Lizzy had grown from a little girl in bows dying to be the next Madonna to- well- maybe she wasn't the next Madonna, but she was certainly Lizzy Lamb.